The downhill battle

So I was going to post another little snippet today, but yea...left my flash drive at home on the coffeetable. Whoops. Perhaps tomorrow.

I was hella productive again writing-wise on Friday. I'm over 56,000 words so it's all downhill from here. I'm now getting to the point in In My Mind's Eye when everything starts to turn upside down for Sophie and Brody. And I'm finding the "bad stuff" hard to write for two reasons: 1) I think I've just grown so close to my characters that it actually hurts ME that bad things are about to happen to them. Is that weird? Probably. It's just hard to write the conflict that's going to mess everything up for them. Trust me, I know it has to happen. A story that's nothing but sunshine and daisies is far from interesting. I just think I'll be in as much pain over it as the characters are. Anyway, 2) I'm almost sad that I'm moving on so quickly and that the story is inevitably going to end. Again, weird, I know. It's the same feeling I get when I'm close to finishing reading a really good book though. I want so badly to finish it and see what happens, but then at the same time, it's just...over. Bittersweet, I guess.

And of course, with the ending of the story comes the scariest part of all: querying agents. Well, after I revise it and revise it again and am absolutely 100% sure that it's completely perfect. I'm already proud of it, but me thinking it's great and an agent who wants to help me get it published and sold thinking it's great are two verrrrrry different things. I'm bracing myself for the rejection that's bound to come in, but I'm also hoping that with that rejection I'll get some good ideas for how to make it even better. Or, how to make my next story better and get THAT one published. I'm not delusional here. I know it's a farfetched dream to think someone will snatch up my very first manuscript and declare it the next Twilight (and I'm totally not going for that anyway- but um, if Rob Pattinson wants to be cast as the lead role if/when it's made into a film, by all means, let's go for it...), but I am definitely hopeful that something will come of it. The power of positive thinking, right? It's just not an option for this to NOT happen...someday, anyway.